Grieving Through the Holidays❣️

holding love and loss together

Hi friends❣️

If I’m being honest, writing hasn’t come easy to me lately. I think it’s because I’ve been trying to force it—trying to be the “happy ray of light” that everyone expects during this chaotic and stressful time of year, with endless to-do lists and holiday expectations.

But instead of forcing something, I decided to lean into what’s really on my heart today—something I know many people are feeling but may be afraid to admit or talk about.

The truth is, I want to shed light on a topic that’s often ignored, avoided, or pushed aside. It’s a vulnerable part of our hearts that we tend to bury because we fear what might happen if we let it rise to the surface. We don’t want to feel the sting of those thorns, the ache of loss, or the weight of emotions we’ve tried so hard to tuck away.

This time of year brings so much joy, but it can also bring so much grief. Maybe it’s the first holiday season without someone you love. Maybe it’s the reminder of a happier time in the past that feels like it’s slipping farther away. Or maybe it’s the pressure to be cheerful and festive when, deep down, you’re just not feeling it.

I want to remind you that it’s okay to feel all of this. It’s okay to sit with the hard stuff and let it exist alongside the moments of joy and love. In fact, it’s necessary—because those emotions are a part of you, and they deserve space, too.

So, if you’re feeling that ache… if you’re carrying grief or longing or simply the exhaustion of trying to keep up with it all… know that you’re not alone. You don’t have to be the “happy ray of light” all the time. Sometimes, just being honest and gentle with yourself is enough.

Let this be a moment to breathe, to let the emotions rise if they need to, and to know that there is strength in allowing yourself to feel. And if you need a little light today, maybe it’s not about forcing it… it’s about finding it in the quiet moments, in the memories, or in simply letting yourself be.

Missing someone you're grieving during the holidays is such a different kind of feeling. One that we might not want to feel but we get to feel because of the love we had for that person.

The holidays can be a time of warmth, joy, and comfort… a time full of love, peace, and happiness. The traditions… the little moments that made Christmas feel like Christmas, brought so much joy, and it's hard to put into words what that meant.

I can't describe it… but it’s like you have one less plate at the table, one less gift under the tree, one less person in the room. It’s a void. Everything looks and feels familiar, yet it doesn’t feel the same at all.

Coming to terms with the fact that Christmas won’t feel the same again without them is such a deep ache. I think that’s why it’s so hard to explain—because you’re mourning both the person and the joy they brought to this special time of year.

AND… I want you to know that it’s okay to feel this way, even if it doesn’t feel okay right now.

It’s okay to let the ache and the love coexist in your heart.

If you’re feeling this too, know that you’re not alone in your grief.

Take comfort in the moments you’ve shared, and let the love linger… hold the love close to your heart.

Even though it’s hard, try to honor what your person meant to you in small ways—lighting a candle, telling a favorite story, or playing their favorite song. These are 3 things that my family does for my sister, and it does bring a glimmer of light to our hearts.

And, above all, be gentle with yourself.

I just learned that grief is a reflection of love, and that changed my perspective.

We grieve because we love… they come together in the same package. We cannot get one without the other.

Love came first.

And that love is what you need to hold on to and carry with you into each and every ‘next moment’.

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I’m here for you & sending my love.

xo kenzie